So, in my single days, I got in the habit of going on a nice warm vacation every winter. I started in 2008 with a cruise to the Western Carribbean, 2009 cruise to the Mexican Riviera with my friend Sayward, 2010 cruise to Cabo (This one was free, I was singing, kind of a big deal) 2011 Malaysia, 2012 cruise to Eastern Carribbean, and later Maui, 2013 Cruise to Western Carribbean again.
I moved to Arizona in March of 2013, and you might think it's warm enough, no need to go on a tropical winter vacation, and I didn't (mainly because I was planning a wedding).
In May Matt and I got married and went to Maui on our honeymoon. It was THE BEST!!! A week of it just being us, doing whatever we wanted to do, getting nice and tan. The only problem was, I was so excited to be married (finally) that I just wanted to get home and have it be real life. Hawaii is always awesome, but it wasn't real life until we went home.
I remember thinking, almost wishing we would have waited a bit to go on our honeymoon. Take a weekend, sure, but come home, start real life and once we're settled, after a few months, go on a nice big vacation then.
Welp, friends, we've been married for 6 months, it's getting colder (I know, it's arizona and still 60's and 70's but I'M COLD) and I reaaaaally could use that vacation right about now.
Thursday, November 20, 2014
Tuesday, November 11, 2014
Things I've learned
Ok, so here are a few things I have realized...
One: When I blogged before, it was most often when I was frustrated with dating. I used my blog as an outlet to turn my frustrations into humorous stories.
Two: When you're just all happy and in love, there isn't much to write about. I can only gush about my amazing husband so much before I lose my precious readers... I care about the handful of you that there are, and I want you to stick around.
Today's blog post is dedicated to the things I've learned in the last 6 months. (Can you believe I've been married for 6 months?? [Next monday officially])
Let's take a minute and talk about stereotypes.
There are lots of husbandly stereotypes out there, Matt doesn't really fit a lot of them. He is very clean, he is very organized, he dresses well, and he doesn't leave his socks in the living room.
For these things I am grateful. That being said, one thing that has been made apparent is his gift for listening and responding, yet not hearing a thing.
Example:
Me- I bought more Olive Oil.
Him- Nice
-Next Day-
Him- we need to get more Olive Oil.
Me- I bought some already. I told you yesterday.
Him- You did?
Me- Yes, remember I said....
Him- oh... oh yeah
-Next Day-
Him, seeing the bottle of Olive Oil- Hey... you got more olive oil
Me- Are you being serious?
Him- What?
This is an example of something that has happened often in our house. It happened again when we had a walk for Lymphoma at the Phoenix Zoo over the weekend. I've learned to tell him things several times, especially as the event draws nearer.
I'll be honest, I love it, I think it's hilarious.
He is not the only one fitting stereotypes, I am guilty as well.
Since being married I have realized, even moreso, that I am a VERY sensitive person, I have been trying to cook more and more and let me tell you, if he likes it, but doesn't rave over it, I have hurt feelings. I read between the lines all the time. A lot of the time I'm right, but making assumptions as a sensitive person is not fair to the Mr.
Example:
Him-We should get you some new frames for your glasses.
Me- So you don't like my glasses?
Me- Why do you keep touching my legs with your feet?
Him- because they are so smooth!
Me- Oh like that's so uncommon?? (Admittedly, it is uncommon. Poor hubs)
And onto the biggest thing that I've learned in the 6 months. This was a more recent lesson.
Toward the end of October I was flown to Utah for two weeks for training for my job. 2 weeks with a 2 day break in between to come back home.
Prior to this, if you were to ask me how I liked Arizona, or if I'd ever come back to Utah my answer would have been, "Oh... it's alright. I mean, I'm fine there, but Utah is always where I wanted to be. Utah will always be home. I don't know that we will ever end up back there, but I would like it if we did."
When I was in Utah working, I MISSED Arizona. I missed the warmth, I miss our friends, I especially and emphatically missed Matt. I missed home. I felt like I was away from home. I was with my family, everyday. I was in the place I had lived for 25 years, but it was no longer home. I missed home. I realized, in being away, that I really did like it there. I liked the life we were building for ourselves, but it wasn't just that. It was Matt.
I remembered reading my parent's blog when they lived in Malaysia, my mom was talking about the same thing, saying she was so sad to leave "home". She was going to miss "home" so much. But, interestingly enough, when there, she felt like she was home. She realized that no matter where she was in the world, as long as she was with my dad she was home.
I remember reading that, and thinking that was really special, but when I was in Utah I internalized it. I knew what she meant.
Matt is home. It's so interesting to me that in such a relatively short amount of time one person can become so incredibly important in your life that being without them makes you feel incomplete.
That is what I have learned in 6 months of marriage. I lived 30 years of my life single and just fine. I was happy, I had a great life, but it was incomplete and I didn't even realize it.
I'm sure we'll move forward and in 20, 30, 40 years I'll look back at these 6 little months and think, "Man, I didn't even know what I was talking about...". Now, this is what I know, and I am so looking forward to learning more.
-Julia Halls
One: When I blogged before, it was most often when I was frustrated with dating. I used my blog as an outlet to turn my frustrations into humorous stories.
Two: When you're just all happy and in love, there isn't much to write about. I can only gush about my amazing husband so much before I lose my precious readers... I care about the handful of you that there are, and I want you to stick around.
Today's blog post is dedicated to the things I've learned in the last 6 months. (Can you believe I've been married for 6 months?? [Next monday officially])
Let's take a minute and talk about stereotypes.
There are lots of husbandly stereotypes out there, Matt doesn't really fit a lot of them. He is very clean, he is very organized, he dresses well, and he doesn't leave his socks in the living room.
For these things I am grateful. That being said, one thing that has been made apparent is his gift for listening and responding, yet not hearing a thing.
Example:
Me- I bought more Olive Oil.
Him- Nice
-Next Day-
Him- we need to get more Olive Oil.
Me- I bought some already. I told you yesterday.
Him- You did?
Me- Yes, remember I said....
Him- oh... oh yeah
-Next Day-
Him, seeing the bottle of Olive Oil- Hey... you got more olive oil
Me- Are you being serious?
Him- What?
This is an example of something that has happened often in our house. It happened again when we had a walk for Lymphoma at the Phoenix Zoo over the weekend. I've learned to tell him things several times, especially as the event draws nearer.
I'll be honest, I love it, I think it's hilarious.
He is not the only one fitting stereotypes, I am guilty as well.
Since being married I have realized, even moreso, that I am a VERY sensitive person, I have been trying to cook more and more and let me tell you, if he likes it, but doesn't rave over it, I have hurt feelings. I read between the lines all the time. A lot of the time I'm right, but making assumptions as a sensitive person is not fair to the Mr.
Example:
Him-We should get you some new frames for your glasses.
Me- So you don't like my glasses?
Me- Why do you keep touching my legs with your feet?
Him- because they are so smooth!
Me- Oh like that's so uncommon?? (Admittedly, it is uncommon. Poor hubs)
And onto the biggest thing that I've learned in the 6 months. This was a more recent lesson.
Toward the end of October I was flown to Utah for two weeks for training for my job. 2 weeks with a 2 day break in between to come back home.
Prior to this, if you were to ask me how I liked Arizona, or if I'd ever come back to Utah my answer would have been, "Oh... it's alright. I mean, I'm fine there, but Utah is always where I wanted to be. Utah will always be home. I don't know that we will ever end up back there, but I would like it if we did."
When I was in Utah working, I MISSED Arizona. I missed the warmth, I miss our friends, I especially and emphatically missed Matt. I missed home. I felt like I was away from home. I was with my family, everyday. I was in the place I had lived for 25 years, but it was no longer home. I missed home. I realized, in being away, that I really did like it there. I liked the life we were building for ourselves, but it wasn't just that. It was Matt.
I remembered reading my parent's blog when they lived in Malaysia, my mom was talking about the same thing, saying she was so sad to leave "home". She was going to miss "home" so much. But, interestingly enough, when there, she felt like she was home. She realized that no matter where she was in the world, as long as she was with my dad she was home.
I remember reading that, and thinking that was really special, but when I was in Utah I internalized it. I knew what she meant.
Matt is home. It's so interesting to me that in such a relatively short amount of time one person can become so incredibly important in your life that being without them makes you feel incomplete.
That is what I have learned in 6 months of marriage. I lived 30 years of my life single and just fine. I was happy, I had a great life, but it was incomplete and I didn't even realize it.
I'm sure we'll move forward and in 20, 30, 40 years I'll look back at these 6 little months and think, "Man, I didn't even know what I was talking about...". Now, this is what I know, and I am so looking forward to learning more.
-Julia Halls
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