It's The Little Things

Last Sunday I was putting Sawyer down for a nap. I had a bottle in one hand and I was browsing through my phone in the other hand. Sawyer was looking up and me and she took her hand and reached down and pushed the hand with my phone down, like, "Focus, Mom!" I laughed about it and went on with my day.
Tonight I was putting Sawyer to bed and it was the same scene, only this time she reached down and grabbed my thumb. I immediately dropped my phone and spent the rest of the time examining her face as she fell asleep holding my hand.
I love those moments. When it's just her and me. She's falling asleep in my arms, the safest place she could be. We sit there in the dark and listen to the ocean waves coming from her sleep sheep, and in that moment, everything is absolute perfection.
As I was looking at her I was thinking of a poem I heard once that talks about how you never know when the last time will be the last time. We've already experienced some lasts. She used to make this face all the time that we called Sawyer Face that she doesn't make anymore. She used to finish eating and streeeeetch and she doesn't do that anymore. I know I have many more nights ahead just like tonight, but before I know it, there will be a last time. Tonight nothing else existed but her and me.

The Last Time

From the moment you hold your baby in your arms,

you will never be the same.

You might long for the person you were before,

When you had freedom and time,

And nothing in particular to worry about.

You will know tiredness like you never knew it before,

And days will run into days that are exactly the same,

Full of feeding and burping,

Whining and fighting,

Naps, or lack of naps. It might seem like a never-ending cycle.

But don't forget...

There is a last time for everything.

There will come a time when you will feed your baby

for the very last time.

They will fall asleep on you after a long day

And it will be the last time you ever hold your sleeping child

One day you will carry them on your hip,

then set them down,

And never pick them up that way again.

You will scrub their hair in the bath one night

And from that day on they will want to bathe alone.

They will hold your hand to cross the road,

The never reach for it again.

They will creep into your room at midnight for cuddles,

And it will be the last night you ever wake for this.

One afternoon you will sing 'the wheels on the bus'

and do all the actions,

Then you'll never sing that song again.

They will kiss you goodbye at the school gate,

the next day they will ask to walk to the gate alone.

You will read a final bedtime story and wipe your

last dirty face.

They will one day run to you with arms raised,

for the very last time.

The thing is, you won't even know it's the last time

until there are no more times, and even then,

it will take you a while to realise.

So while you are living in these times,

remember there are only so many of them and

when they are gone,

you will yearn for just one more day of them

For one last time.

Author unknown

Chapter 3: Meeting His Family

One thing that was hard for me, while we were dating, was the fact that I felt like Matt wasn't seeing the real me. Everything we did in Arizona was on his turf. I had some friends there, yes, but no one in Arizona had any depth on the person I was or WHY I was the person I was.
I feel like that is an important part in dating; seeing the person around their people. That's when you get to see who they really are.
I remember meeting Matt's best friend Ben and his wife Breann. We met them at Ikea and just walked around the store for a while. It wasn't anything spectacular, and I was intimidated by them so I'm sure I was pretty quiet. Not too long after that we all went to a movie. I remember Matt went to the bathroom and when he left Ben leaned over to me and said, "By the way, you're our favorite" While Breann nodded in agreement. He then said, "Matt has brought around some real riff raff" I was so happy that they liked me. It is so important to be liked by your man's people.

One thing I loved about dating Matt was, he always seemed so confident in where he stood with me. We never had any DTR (determine the relationship) or anything like that. We never had to sit down and discuss where this was headed. He just had the mind set of, "I want this to progress, so I'll progress and if she doesn't want to then I'll know"
I remember we went to Grimaldi's and there was a guy there that was an architect on the project Matt was working on. He took me over to him and said, "This is my girlfriend Julia". I remembered being so caught off guard but I loved that. I just thought, "Oh... ok so I'm his girlfriend now." and that was that.

November 16, Saturday:
Matt was doing a mountain bike race with his brother Craig. It was 12 hour relay so he'd be gone all day. He invited me to meet him there and hang out when he wasn't racing. I was excited but nervous because that meant meeting his brother.
Matt and I had both talked about what meeting the family means. Matt and I are both the youngest in our families. We both dated a lot and we were both "old" for being single in the LDS world. Introducing people to the family meant getting their hopes up, and eventually having to answer a lot of questions about why they aren't coming around anymore. I remember talking to my mom about a new guy once. At the end of the conversation she says, "What was his name again?" I said, "It really doesn't matter. By the next time I see you he likely won't be the one I'm talking about anymore"
I knew Matt looked up to Craig a lot so I was excited that he wanted me to meet him.

I had been rowing all day so I wasn't able to get to the trail until that night. When I got there, Matt was racing. I saw a guy that looked alarmingly like Matt and knew that had to be Craig, but being the introvert I am I just stood out of view for a while until I saw Matt cross the finish line. I walked up and Matt introduced us. That was his last ride in the relay so we got to spend the rest of the time just hanging out with Craig and the other racers. It was a lot of fun and I felt really comfortable around them. The only downside was, we were hanging out in a Winnebago with about 6 guys who'd been mountain biking all day. Stinky.
That night we went back to my apartment and Matt told me that Craig really liked me. He then said, "I'm excited for the rest of my family to meet you"
I knew Matt had dinner with his family on the third Sunday of every Month. That happened to be the next day. I said, "You have dinner with your family tomorrow right?" He said, "Yeah" I said, "Well... I'd like to go." He said, "You want to come to my family dinner?" I said, "Yeah I would." He said, "Ok"
Looking back, I don't remember being nervous at all. I knew he had a BIG family (being the youngest of 9) but I had a big family. I knew how my family was in these situations, and I felt like, I could handle what they threw at me.
I honestly don't remember the initial walk through the door or anything, but I do remember when everyone got their food I was sitting at the counter with a plate and all of the sudden I was surrounded by sisters (I think it was Alison, Heather, Cindy and Aubri and a few of the older neices) They were asking me about my life and my family. About my work and my hobbies. About how Matt and I met and how long we'd been dating. They were so interested in me. They kept asking me if I was overwhelmed or if this was too much to take in, but I just told them it wasn't. It felt just like my family dinners at home. I could see it in their eyes. The hope. The "is this the one?" I wondered the same things.

We had to leave early because I was singing in a fireside that night. I remember when we left his mom gave him a hug and I could see she whispered something in his ear. If I'm not mistaken she was telling him, "I really like her"

I was glad I met his family then because Thanksgiving was soon after and I got to spend that with them as well. Being my first Thanksgiving in Arizona and away from my family, I was really glad to be able to spend it with his family.

This was taken the day after Thanksgiving.

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

5 Months Old

Another month has come and gone. They are going so fast these days. I can't believe Sawyer is almost half a year old!

This month she has MASTERED rolling over. She only really struggles when she's up against a wall. She's not an ambi-roller and if she tries to roll towards the wall or the edge of the couch she gets rather frustrated. It's pretty dang cute to watch her try though.

She has also found her feet and apparently they are rather tasty. As soon as she is laid on her back her feet are up in the air and in her mouth. Makes diaper changes really fun (if she's not eating her feet, she's trying to roll over. Babies are hard to wrestle)

We also started her on solid foods. I don't know if you can call them solid, they look pretty mushy to me. So far she's had, bananas, mango puree, and some other fruit combinations. She didn't seem to like them too much. Probably a combination of learning how to eat and liking what she's eating. I held off on the mixed veggies and stuff, because that just sounds so gross to me, but, as it turns out, she LOVES them. The mixed veggies are the first ones that she has actually finished.
Feeding her is also a battle. She REALLY wants to help me with the spoon. It's so fun to watch her try new things.

She has a pretty good sleep schedule. We're still working on getting her naps back (4 month sleep regression is real my friends) but thankfully her night sleeping has been awesome. She typically goes to bed by 7 and wakes up between 6 and 7. I never know when she's going to nap or how long. They'll either be 25 minutes or 3 hours.  I was talking to my sister this month and telling her, "It's amazing how much you can get done when your baby could wake up any minute."
 I have to stay in her room with her as she falls asleep because if she's not tired yet she'll play in her crib and roll to her back and then she won't be able to fall asleep. (She doesn't know that if she just rolled back over she'd be fine) So I sit next to her crib, out of site, and wait. Once she starts laying her head down I know I can leave, but if she's propped up, I wait. My favorite thing is going into her room after a nap, or in the morning. She'll be just cooing away and I walk in, she's normally on her back in the corner of the crib, holding her feet or playing with one of her stuffed animals. She sees me and she gets so excited. AH I love that I'm her mom.

In the last couple of weeks she has started pushing herself up on her hands and knees and she'll do the rocking thingy. I am quite familiar with this motion after watching my nieces and nephews. Crawling is right around the corner.

She is a hand sucker too. If she's really tired and about to fall asleep she'll suck her thumb, if she's awake it's THE WHOLE HAND. I'm not kidding, it's pretty amazing.

She is a pretty happy baby. It's pretty easy to get her to smile. I just watch her all day in amazement.

Every month I seem to love her more. I look back on the other months and KNOW I loved her then, but did I love her THIS MUCH??

Likes:
Peek-a-boo
When mom sings to her
Baths (LOVES)
Eating
Everything in her mouth
Being on Mom and Dad's bed, she loves to watch me get ready or fold laundry and ESPECIALLY loves watching me brush my teeth, it's so fascinating to her. Honestly if she's fussy, I can put her on our bed and she's usually entertained for a while.
Being outside (but she does NOT like the sun in her face, so it's hard to take her out very often. Over-cast days are the best.

Dislikes:
When I make a bottle in front of her (she gets hangry like no one's business) if she sees a bottle she needs to eat RIGHT THEN. Yesterday I fed her and when it was gone she cried and cried, then she calmed down, then she saw the empty bottle and started crying again. I couldn't help but laugh. It just takes her a minute or two to realize that she's not hungry anymore.
Being put down to bed. She usually falls asleep pretty fast, but when I put her in her crib she gets real upset for a minute.
She's starting to get a little stranger danger.
Crowded, chaotic restaurants (learned that the hard way)

 This was the beginning of the month. She'll go up on her hands now too

 Feeding herself like a boss. (She doesn't do this much, just holds my hands mainly)

 Typical stance

 I mean... come on with the cuteness.

 This hurts me just to look at her, but mmmmm feets

 Seriously, she tries to eat everything

 Our little cheerleader. I will be out of my element if that comes true.

My 5 month old baby!

Chapter 2: The First Two Weeks

October 6, 2013; Sunday.

I was over at a friend's house watching general conference and I got a text from Matt

I knew I wanted to go, but I did NOT want to go by myself. So I asked my friend Ali to come with me. I picked her up that night and said, "So do you know Matt Halls?" She stopped dead in her tracks and said, "Um... yes, that's my [recent] ex-boyfriend's good friend." It was a recent wound and I felt terrible opening it so I told her we did NOT have to go. She assured me that she was fine, that he probably wouldn't be there. So we went.
As soon as I got there I found Matt in the back playing ping pong. He lit up when he saw me, which was the cutest. We sat in the kitchen and just talked for quite a while. (Ali was the perfect wing woman. She knew some people at the game night so she just made herself comfortable while I got my flirt on).
I remember that I was venting about my job and looking back it was like word vomit. I just KEPT TALKING ABOUT IT, but he feigned interest, which I appreciate.
By the end of the conversation we had a date set for the following Tuesday.

October 8, 2013: Tuesday
For our first date he picked me up and we went to Toby Keith's Bar and Grill. We just kept the date short, had dinner and a nice convo and then he brought me home. A few things I remember from that date was him eating fries with a fork and the fact that we were like the only people in the restaurant. Probably because we were at a bar at like 6:00.
He dropped me off that night and I knew I wanted to see him again. I also knew that I was going out of town that weekend for my nephew's baptism. I didn't want to wait until I got home to see him again.
The next day we were texting and I mentioned that I was going out of town Thursday night. So we set a date for lunch on Thursday.

October 10, 2013: Thursday
Matt was on his lunch break from work, so I met him at Spinato's Pizza for lunch. I got all excited when I saw him. At the time he was going to school for construction Management and was working as an intern for Okland Construction. He looked the part. Plaid shirt, jeans and work boots. I didn't hate it. After lunch I was thoroughly disappointed that I wouldn't see him again until the following week.

The whole time I was in Utah we were texting constantly. I flew back into Arizona on Monday night and Tuesday the 15th we had plans.

October 15, 2013: Tuesday DATE 3!

I emphasize the fact that it was date 3 because that has special meaning. In the LDS single's scene (especially for those of us in our late 20's [which I was at the time, am not anymore :(] ) a third date means that both parties are interested in seeing where this goes. If both parties are interested in pursuing this, that means that the physical barrier will likely be breached on date 3.
We were going to a movie. Going to a movie is basically saying, "I'm gonna start holding your hand now" so I had expectations.
During the movie (Captain Phillips) I could barely focus because I was thinking about holding his hand the whole time. "Should I hold his hand? Should I make my hand available to him? Is he going to do something?" Then he leaned forward. I know that this is the international sign for "scratch my back" but I got SO nervous. I sat there and stared at his back... "Should I scratch it? I'm sure he wants me to, but what if he doesn't? I don't want to make things weird..." And then he leaned back and I felt bad that I didn't accept the invitation. I decided I wanted to test him and see if that is, in fact, what he was trying to get me to do, so I leaned forward. Almost immediately he started scratching my back and I felt like an idiot.
I sat back and again, all I was thinking about was holding his hand. I feel like my thoughts were practically audible. "Just do it... just hold his hand... you know he likes you... just do it. JUST DO IT! DO IT!" And then in a rapid, totally unsmooth motion, I grabbed his hand, and he laughed. From that point on, things were super comfortable.
He brought me home that night, walked me to the door and gave me a sweet little kiss goodnight. For some reason the hand holding made me way more nervous. I do remember at that point feeling like holding hands was more of a statement than kissing. Holding hands in public mainly. Plus it was the first contact. I think once we were holding hands, we both knew that we would kiss that night. I really appreciated that the first kiss was just a peck goodnight. I feel like it was very respectful.
From that date on, we saw each other every day.
To be continued...

Chapter 1: Love at first sight???

I decided I wanted to write down our story piece by piece so I can have it printed up.

September 30, 2013: Monday
My single's stake had a talent show. I was singing a song I had written (Just Friends) and had a guy in my ward playing the guitar for me (I don't do so well at singing and playing at the same time, so I taught it to him).

Matt was there with his ward band, he played the drums for them. I remember being in a room to practice and he came in with another girl to practice also, but left when they saw us. No words exchanged.

The talent show was so fun, but I pretty much was there alone, so once it was over my plan was to just bee-line it out of there. I am a total introvert and I get anxiety and the thought of talking to people after I sing, so I just wanted out of there.

As everyone was standing to get refreshments I looked over across the aisle and saw Matt sitting there, looking at me, with a little smile on his face. Honestly, I can still see it when I think about it and it STILL gives me butterflies. I definitely thought he was cute, but because of my introvertness I knew I wouldn't talk to him, and would probably never see him again. He assumed I was dating the guy that played the guitar for me, so he wasn't going to talk to me either. So, what's the harm in a little eye flirtation? We locked eyes for a good 3 seconds. That is a LONG time to make eye contact with a stranger, if you think about it. It was totally intentional, you could cut the tension with a knife. Then I got up and left.

October 4, 201: Friday
My friend Ashley had invited me to meet up with her and a group of people for dinner and a movie. She had become a really good friend of mine over the summer so of course I went. At dinner she was telling me about these guys that were going to be meeting us at the movie. I remember her talking about Matt and saying, "You guys might actually hit it off...". I was interested in a guy in Utah at the time, so I wasn't really "looking" but hey, it never hurts to have options (especially options in the same state).

After dinner we went to the movie and the two guys came and sat down. I was sitting in between Matt and Ashley (at this point I did not recognize him from the talent show). As soon as he sat down Ashley started asking him about all the girls in his life. Again, I was sitting right between them so I kind of leaned back to get out of their way. I remember Matt was giving her one word answers and a lot of "oh... yeah... not interested in her anymore." or "Oh, that's not happening...". Honestly, my first impression was, "Oh he's one of those guys... Always dating a different girl. Probably cocky. No thanks." Once the movie started, and throughout, he and I would just kind of make jokes (we were seeing Austenland which was really silly so there was a lot to make fun of) He was fun to flirt with, but I still had my reservations about him.

When the movie ended and we were all walking out he said to me, "What stake are you in?" I said, "Tempe" he said, "Were you in the talent show on Monday?"
This is when I realized who he was and I was MORTIFIED!!! You guys... I STARED at him for multiple seconds. As mentioned before, it was flirtatious and it was intentional and I thought I would never see him again! I was bright red in the face, but thankfully it was night time.
I kept my cool, outwardly, and just said, "Oh yeah... I was there."
Little did I know, as soon as he saw me in the theater he knew who I was. He sat down next to me on purpose, and when Ashley was talking to him about all the women in his life, he was trying to SHUT THAT DOWN!

At this point there was about 5 of us standing outside the theater talking. It was getting to the point for him to ask for my number and I thought that would be SUPER awkward in front of everyone. I figured if he really wanted it he could get it from Ashley, so quite abruptly I said, "K, bye!" and went home.

The next day I got a text from Ashley that said, "So... I know you have that guy in Utah so I didn't want to do anything without talking to you first, but Matt was asking about you." I said, "Did he want to know my story?" She said, "Yes, that's exactly what he said." I said, "Well nothing is happening with the guy in Utah, so I'm fine with you giving him my number."

October 6, 2013: Sunday

To Be Continued...

4 Month Update

I cannot believe our little Sawyer Mae is 4 months old (as of Feb 8). Time is just flying by.

This last month we had a lot of changes. I started working part time, which has been so nice. When Matt and I made that decision my mind raced at all that I would be able to get done at home. I made a chore chart for each day, I had a menu for each day, I had a workout...

Turns out, I have time to accomplish one of those things each day OR I can shower and get ready. I usually do pretty well with keeping the house tidy, and keeping the laundry done, but as far as deep cleaning goes, I'm not able to get to as much as I'd like.

I also have done pretty well at making our dinners a few nights a week. Matt has been working late this week so I haven't been doing anything special for dinner.

Even though I don't have as much time as I thought I would, I am LOVING spending this time with my baby girl. Every time I go to pick her up from the sitter, she gets a big smile on her face. I love that she knows who I am.

It's so fun to watch her learn and grow. It's fun to listen to her experiment with her voice. Lately, when she's crying for attention, it's a lot deeper. She's so funny, she'll learn how to do something with her voice, and then that is how she'll cry for a couple of days.

She started rolling from her back to her tummy on her 3 month mark and now if we put her on her back she won't last longer than 5 minutes. That makes diaper changes SUPER fun. The problem is, once she rolls to her tummy she can't see as much as she did before so she gets frustrated. If she's on her tummy, it's best to have her on our bed or on the couch so she can see what's going on. We have to keep a good eye on her though because she rolls all over the place.

We are still waiting to hear her little giggle. I thought she was right on the cusp of laughing like 2 months ago, but she is just dragging her little feet. She gets so excited that her whole body will tense up and her smile gets so big she can barely contain herself, but she does NOT laugh.

She sleeps like a rock star! She typically goes to bed between 7 and 7:30 and she'll sleep for about 12 hours. She'll take one good 2.5-3 hour nap at some point during the day, and a few 30 minuters throughout the day. If she's tired and we lay her down, she doesn't cry at all, she just finds her little thumb and falls asleep pretty quick. She only sucks her thumb when she's tired and ready to sleep, but I'm sure that will increase over time. I haven't been used to her sleeping through the night, so I'm still not getting very good sleep. I do think that is starting to change though.

Last little note. I have been singing to Sawyer a lot. It's so fun to watch her watch me sing. Her eyes go from my mouth to my eyes, back to my mouth, over and over. She smiles so big and coo's along with me. Sunday night we were at Matt's brother's house to watch the 2nd half of the Super Bowl. We left at about 8:15, which was way past her bedtime and she was MAD. She was just screaming in her car seat, so I climbed back there and started singing to her. She stopped crying almost immediately and just watched me as I sang to her for the rest of the drive, probably at least 10 minutes. I wrote about this in my journal that night. It was definitely in my top 3 life moments.

Yesterday was her 4 month wellness check. She is 14.5 pounds (52nd percentile, up from 32nd) She is 25 inches long (93rd percentile up from 67... this just blows my mind. The doc thinks she probably just had a growth spurt recently. I'm sure that percentage will go back down. Matt and I are not tall people) and her head is in the 87th percentile, which hasn't ever really changed.
Dr Milius said she was just perfect. When I told him she rolled from her back to her tummy at 3 months he looked at her and said, "That is NOT normal. You, little girl, are advanced!" Course she is... she's a genius. He gave us the go ahead to start her on solids. We are so excited to try that. Once Matt isn't working late we'll do it. I think it's something we should do together for the first time.
She also had to get 4 immunizations yesterday. I'm so glad they are so fast with those. She cried, of course, as they pricked her, but it was over so fast and I picked her right up and she calmed down pretty quickly then slept on the way home.
All day yesterday she was so happy. Even when she got tired she just had such a big smile on her face. The only way I knew she was tired is she kept yawning and going for her thumb so I put her to bed.

It's crazy how much she has changed our lives and what a BIG part of our lives she is now. Last night I waited up for Matt and we chit chatted when he got home. This is the second night that Sawyer was asleep when he got home and we ended up spending a good chunk of time looking at pictures and videos of her... that cracked me up.

We sure love our little one.

She always holds our fingers when she's eating her bottle

 Thumb sucker

 Holding her own bottle, like a boss.

 Sunday Best

This has got to be one of my favorite pictures of us.

 That smile just cracks me up

 She had a few days where she wouldn't nap longer than 30 minutes, so she was tired all the time. She fell asleep on us a lot in those days, and we kind of loved it

 Nother Sunday best shot.

 Getting better at sitting up.

Holding her own bottle again, and looking like she just got caught.

 4 months old

 about to get her shots

if she's not sucking her thumb, shes' sucking her whole hand.

 

 



Life is Boring

More often than not, when Matt and I are getting ready for bed (around 8-8:30) the question arises: Are we a boring married couple?
These are my thoughts...

My typical day right now consists of, being woken up by my beautiful daughter. I feed her, change her, pick out a cute outfit for the day, put her on the bed, lie next to her and we look into each other's eyes while she is smiling and cooing away, flailing her body with all her might. I'll go to work for a portion of the day, then pick up my baby from the sitter's, come home, feed her, put her down for a nap, get some chores done around the house and/or a quick workout. She wakes up, I change her and feed her and we play for a while until Daddy comes home. He takes the baby and I'll get some dinner together (or I'll take the baby and he'll whip something up). We put on a show, eat dinner and play with our baby, trying our best to make her laugh (to no avail). We feed her, change her, get her in some jammies and put her to bed, then we get ready for bed ourselves.

Gone are the days of staying up till all hours of the night hanging out with friends. Gone are the days of late movies and leaving the house past 8:00.

I suppose that does make us a boring married couple, but the thing is, this "boring" life is what I've dreamed of having for my whole life.

When I was a teenager I'd fantasize about who I'd marry, how many kids we'd have, where we'd live. I'd imagine our kids and their names. I'd imagine being a stay at home mom, and all that that would entail. I'd think about my extended family and how much fun we'd all have when we'd get together and that one day my immediate family would become that extended family. I'd imagine my family getting together and all of our kids playing while we chit chatted and caught up. I'd imagine the stories our kids will tell later on of things they did right under our noses that we never knew about.

When I was in my 20's I longed for all of that and wondered if I'd ever actually have it. The dream became a wish and one I didn't think would be granted. I had so much fun in my singleness but I knew all the time that I was living life "in case". I was working as though I'd always have to fend for myself. I played as though this was the best that life would ever get so I better make it a good one. I was living my life to be mentally and physically prepared to always be on my own. The typical day, mentioned above, may as well have been a fairy tale.

Two years ago Monday (January 18th) Matt asked me to marry him, and the dream was starting to become a reality.

It's so cliché, but to say I love him more now than ever is an understatement. In the last two years we have encountered so much and grown together so much. Every time I talk about him to someone else, especially when I'm talking about a disagreement we've had or a misunderstanding (I still wouldn't say we've ever been in a fight) they say, "Wow! What great communication!" They tell me how lucky I am to have a husband who will sit down and talk things through the way he does. They don't need to tell me how lucky I am.
When Matt and I got engaged I knew I loved him. I knew I was lucky to have him want to marry me. I didn't know how seriously he would take his role as a husband. I didn't know how well he would take care of me and how much he would sacrifice to make sure I was happy. I didn't know I was marrying a man who would be so devoted to me. I didn't know I was marrying someone who would make me feel that I was the best thing that has happened to him and how often he would make me feel like he thought HE was the lucky one. I didn't know that he would be the best thing I could have by my side as I had our baby. I didn't know what having a baby could do for our love. I didn't know what kind of a father he would be and how intensely he would love our child. I didn't know that I was marrying someone who would make my biggest fantasy come true.

I didn't know that having a boring life could make me happier than I have ever been.